TOXIC MOMMY CULTURE TRAITS TO LEAVE BEHIND
Mommy Juice
Needing alcohol and hard drugs to parent is not the flex that these memes and social media posts are attempting to normalize. If you need alcohol or hard drugs to parent then you need to be addressing some serious issues in your life. Addiction is no joke, and parenting is not a reason to hit the bottle. If you are struggling please reach out to community for support.
Comparison
I try to share the ups and downs of my day to day life when i’m so inclined since every so often I get a “your life seems so perfect, I kind of hate you” message that sends me reeling. I’m like ME? Girl you don’t want all this. I always hope people consuming media online take things with a grain of salt and not over romanticize what folks are CHOOSING to share about themselves online. Comparison is the thief of joy, if a certain content creator or really anyone makes you feel less than, unfollow, unsubscribe, or take a break from them. Me included. Do not compare yourselves to anyone. Better yet if there is something about them you admire, figure out a way to learn that skill or welcome whatever energy their posts or life makes you yearn for instead of hate watching or feeling miserable about it.
Bounce Back / Snapping Back after pregnancy
Genetics, stress levels, nourishment, rest, and previous fitness all play a role in a pregnant caregivers bodies ability to recovery after pregnancy. The reality is that your body will NEVER EVER be the same as it was after you gave birth. It is a different body now. Accept and normalize taking your time to let your body heal post birth . To each their own, but RUSHING cosmetic “mommy makeover” surgeries is dangerous and though some folks come out on the other side ok, a lot of caregivers end up orphaning their children or beginning life long issues if things go wrong. I hate that social media has made this a thing, our ancestors didnt care about having perky boobs and neither should we.
Overscheduling your children
It’s not hard to fall into the trap of signing your young children up for extra curricular activities when from pregnancy we are inundated with messages about how to train your baby to read, jump, play a musical instrument from the moment they come out almost. Young children do not need that much. Over-scheduling is stressful and overstimulating often times for both kiddos and their parents. Let them be
Judging each other
In 2022, there was a massive formula shortage after several types of formula were recalled for contamination. A lot of sanctified breastfeeding folks shared snarky statuses about how this could have been avoided if people had just breastfed. During a scary time instead of rallying to support other terrified parents and help infants they instead chose to be judgmental and sanctimonious. I am using harsh language because its true, sometimes we are cruel to each other when we need to rally and provide support instead of judgement. If you find yourself feeling self righteous in a situation, take a step back and put yourself in someones lived experience and try to empathize.
I am imperfect, I mess up, but I wake up each morning with intention of being good to myself, the world, and those in it. Our children deserve better examples of how to treat the Earth and each other.
